Intro to the life of a lonely housewife

About me :
31 yrs old
mother of 3  we will call them T (girl 13 yrs) , D (boy 12yrs) & K (girl 11yrs)
married to a man that is married to his job we will call him Hubby
I live in the country ( thats where Hubby always wanted to live) it's really more like no mans land, 10 miles to the nearest town. so we will refer to home as NML
I have no car , no job, no phone service in NML i do have a house phone but cant call long distance on it and well again inNML everything is long distance,and no friends unless they need something i don't hear from or see them.
I stay at NML 24hrs a day 7 days a week sometime for several weeks at a time.
I am a very depressed & bitter bitch most of the time nowdays, i wasnt always like this.
Once I was a happy outgoing woman I had a life outside these four walls (this was before we moved to NML) I loved to be around people and absolutly LOVED being with Hubby and the kids, I laughed and played and smiled alot . Now i hate life,people and really don't wanna be around Hubby or the kids I LOVE them very much and cant imagine not haveing them I just don't like them very much right now, and i absolutly hate me. I use to be 115lbs now im 148lbs 5ft 1 and feel like a fat cow i was going to the gym and started loosing weight and was feeling pretty good about myself then we moved to NML and i never leave the house so whats the point in looking good, most days i dont even get out of my pj's. Hell truth be told most days i just sit here and cry.
I know im depressed but can't change the situation im in so i just gotta live with it, thats getting really hard to do somedays.
I haven't had sex with Hubby in over a month, I try everything but he don't wanna when we do on average of once a month i usualy have to beg. he's to tired, to stressed with work or don't feel well most of the time.
We use to have a awesome sex life, 6 times a day, forplay, all that now its just well wham bam thanks till next month.
well thats my life story over the last 6 mth or so since moving to NML now you are pretty much caught up on the basics so ill sign off till tomorrow. or till i have something else to say!